Traveling through Grief by Susan J. R.N. Zonnebelt-Smeenge

Author:Susan J. R.N. Zonnebelt-Smeenge
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Grief, Bereavement—Religious aspects—Christianity, Grief—Religious aspects—Christianity, Bereavement—Psychological aspects, REL012000, SEL010000
ISBN: 9781585585298
Publisher: Baker Publishing Group
Published: 2006-09-01T00:00:00+00:00

THE SPIRITUAL PERSPECTIVE

Memories

Luke 22:17–19: “After taking the cup, he [Jesus] gave thanks and said, ‘Take this and divide it among you. For I tell you I will not drink again of the fruit of the vine until the kingdom of God comes.’ And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, ‘This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me.’”

• How does the Bible encourage us to create and use memories? How can I make meaning out of the death and cherish my memories of my loved one?

The person you loved has died. The reality of the death is hard enough to accept and believe. As the shock and numbness begin to diminish, however, something else happens. Memories! An onslaught of images, sounds, smells—each one triggering reminders of both good and tough times. What do you do with the memories, especially when they seem to be both comforting and disturbing at the same time?

God wants you to remember even as you move on in your life. Memories do two things—one of which is often unpleasant, the other pleasant. The unpleasant part is that a memory marks the fact that you have moved on. In the passage quoted above, Jesus is eating the last earthly meal with his disciples prior to his death. They sense the danger that lies ahead of them. Judas has already been revealed as the one who would betray Christ. Then Jesus does a strange thing. He talks about the wine as his blood and bread as his body. He instructs his disciples to repeat this sacrament “in remembrance of me” (Luke 22:19). Something tangible, like bread and wine, is now to serve as a lasting memorial of Christ’s life, death, and eventual resurrection. The tough part is knowing the actual event can’t be repeated. Jesus’s meal with his disciples was the actual event. The sacrament of the Lord’s Supper becomes the memorial. You had a special relationship with your loved one. But with their death, that relationship has become a memory—a thing from the past—part of your history. That’s the hard part.

The pleasant part is that God embraces and encourages memories. So churches and believers repeat the sacrament of the Lord’s Supper regularly. In this sacrament, believers remember both the pain Christ endured on the cross because of our sin and the joy of his resurrection for our salvation on Easter morning. God wants you to keep significant memories alive and fresh. At first, the memories of your loved one may be painful. They may awaken a deep yearning within you to have that special person back in your life. But as you move through your grief, these memories will bring comfort, assurance, a smile to your face, and a warm glow around your heart.

There is one other thing about Christian memories suggested by Christ’s memorial sacrament. Surely, the bread and wine were chosen to help us remember the events of his death and resurrection. But they also encourage us to remember God’s role in this.

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